Sadie, Sadie, Married Lady

Thanks, Ina.

Welcome to Cheaper Than Therapy, a newsletter for 80s babies by Shani Silver.

I can recite the 1968 film Funny Girl from start to finish. I’ve told you that before. That’s how many times I’ve watched the movie since the first time my mother taped it off the TV in the mid-80s. While it might be safe to assume I grew attached to Funny Girl based on the female Jewish representation, we’re talking about Barbara Streisand here, and I can’t sing for shit. I fell for the film because Fanny Brice was funny, unconventionally attractive, odds-defyingly successful, and at least for a time, reciprocally in love.

Ina Garten’s memoir came out recently—I preordered it of course. Upon reading, it’s instantaneously clear that there is no story of Ina without Jeffrey. He’s in every memory and every decision, something inescapable when you marry at 20 and (happily) stay that way for the rest of your life. I knew I’d instantly have trouble relating to Ina because my story is so much more solitary than hers. Still, relating isn’t the reason to read a celebrity memoir. For me the point is consuming as many stories from successful people as possible, to remind myself of all the different ways people get there. If their paths are unbeaten, mine can be too. Very early on in the book there’s a chapter called “Sadie, Sadie, Married Lady,” a line pulled directly from Funny Girl though Ina herself never says it and doesn’t have to. The chapter is about Ina getting married, but when I read just the title, and even now as I typed the words out for you, I broke down. Since the first time I sat too close to the TV and pressed play, I’ve wanted to be a Sadie, too. At 42 and single, there is a chance I may never be.