Is Shani A Desperate Pick Me?
One reader thinks so.
Welcome to Cheaper Than Therapy, a newsletter by Shani Silver.
We need to talk. Last week, I published a newsletter about the absence of single men in public spaces where single women go. One of the comments on this post was not a “hard truth,” as the commenter put it, but rather an offensive, degrading take on who I am as a person, as well as a dismissal of my body of work in such a hurtful way that it’s getting its own newsletter—because “fuck you” seems woefully insufficient. And if that seems harsh please know that there are consequences for bring rude to me. I don’t have to just “take it.”
The comment, now removed to protect their privacy, read as follows:
In 2018 I began very public and vulnerable work to dismantle societal single-shaming and help single women live happier, fuller lives free from the burden of pursuing partnership, and free from the low self worth that prompts us to settle for less than what we actually want. I built a following 100% organically, being perpetually overlooked by agents, sponsors, publishers, PR, brands, you name it—all because my content wasn’t “marketable.” I made my content anyway, because if I can climb out of a hole of singlehood misery to a place of self worth and happiness, I’m bringing other single women with me. I have been swimming against a societal current for years, working my ass off to bolster the self worth of a cohort of people the world would rather ignore because we’re just so embarrassing. In all those years I have never seen a person try to shame me the way I’ve been trying to prevent shame from happening to others, the way I try to help single women stop shaming themselves. I’ve been called everything under the sun online. This is the only comment I’ve ever found truly shocking. You can call me desperate if you want to, but don’t expect my silence to follow.