I Need A Therapist, Not A Vibrator

Singlehood is a mental health issue, not a "dry spell" one.

Welcome to Cheaper Than Therapy, a healing newsletter for 80s babies by Shani Silver. This newsletter does not publish free content, but if you’d like to read it you can subscribe here. Thank you for enjoying the work of independent writers.

Bathroom walls, a treasure trove of rare art.

You know those “unboxing” videos where influencers stand next to a pile of cardboard as tall as the boyfriend who takes all their photos for free and shows you the shit they were gifted by various brands? I’ve been a public-facing internet-based writer for more than ten years and I’ve had over 40,000 followers on Tiktok for two. Can you guess the sort of brands who reach out to me as a singlehood-focused creative? Apart from a plethora of wildly questionable jewelry companies who are definitely not not fronts for other “businesses,” it’s vibrators. Only vibrators. That’s the only kind of brand that looks at my work and thinks…this makes sense.

When the world thinks of single women, they think of what we lack, and for some reason the assumption is that we lack orgasms, rather than someone to split the cost of rent and bills and kill the spiders. The sad single girl of a marketing team’s imagination just can’t get laid, we should help her! Let’s pick one thing, her most private thing, and care about that the most, instead of something that might actually improve her day-to-day. Hey Shani, we love your work, and we’d love to send you a complimentary Nitro-Vibe in exchange for your honest review. Babe…