Did I Age Out Of Getting Married?
Life after expectations as a single woman.
Welcome to Cheaper Than Therapy, a newsletter by Shani Silver.
No one is too old to get married, ever—but we’re also allowed to want companionship before we’re old. I wanted to meet someone when I was younger so that I could experience a significant part of my life with them, and I simply didn’t. Something I really envisioned for myself didn’t happen when I wanted it to. It didn’t even happen a decade after I wanted it to. And it’s not like it was a small desire, it was a pretty big decision about the kind of life I wanted to lead. Now, I have a choice to either let disappointment define me, or choose my own definition. Longtime readers already know my choice.
We’re in a time of rewriting stories, because nothing is happening like we were raised to believe it would. We are the first generation that really might never get married. Not because we didn’t want to, but because an insurmountable number of odds were stacked against us. The end result is aging into an era of life that doesn’t feel particularly bridal. Brides feel a full generation (or two!) younger than me these days and that can be a bit unsteadying. Have you noticed how much older you are than people getting married this summer? Sometimes it knocks the wind out of me.