Attention, Please
Welcome to Cheaper Than Therapy, a healing newsletter for 80s babies by Shani Silver. This newsletter does not publish free content, but if you’d like to read it you can subscribe here. Thank you for enjoying the work of independent writers.
Recently, at brunch, where all things happen, I sat across the table from a friend who had, the night before, sent a drunk text. The text was not soliciting sexual activity of any kind, get ahold of yourselves. She’d simply expressed real feelings and affection for someone she’d been casually hooking up with over recent months. By morning, regret had replaced the Aperol, and she felt terrible about herself. Fortunately, she was sitting across the table from me.
Sometimes, as singles, we are starving. I don’t use that word lightly, mostly because I don’t view singlehood as a lack, I don’t think our lives are incomplete without partners, and I don’t think we’re less capable of living full, valid lives than anyone who’s married. Starvation for single people can come in a variety of formats. We can feel starved for physical contact, shut out of disposable income those splitting rent enjoy, but here specifically I want to talk about the very real scenario wherein single people are starved for attention.